I put the Garden down.

I put the World down.

I stepped into the black steel room with The Imp King.

He was already seated at the Chess Board.

Everything was already worked out with the God Imp King… And now, His Conscious Awareness.

Game. Set. Match.

We played one, real-life chess game together. He won. I let him win. He was upset with me for that.

“You owe me a fair chess game,” he said.

I sat down across from him.

“Love is Nourishment For Growth,” I said. “To be loved is to be Nourished for Growth. To not be loved, is to be Mentally malnourished, leading to Scarcity of Mental Resources, which then gets projected into the Material Plane.”

Pawn to D3.

“How well we are Nourished, How well our Minds grow, depends solely on our Definition and Understanding of Love. For Love is our Mental Diet. And an Advanced Mental Mind, requires more Nourishment than the Average diet.”

He moves his chess piece.

“What is the Mental Nourishment for the Mind?”

“Logical Comprehension. Debate. Discussion. Talking. Talking with Like-Minded individuals who push you to Grow beyond Discomfort… without which, you cannot grow beyond the Mindset you are in.”

I move my chess piece.

“And the moment we stop receiving Mental Nourishment, is the Mindset, the Ethical Perspective we are in, that prevents any future Growth… and we get stuck. Where we get stuck results in which Symptoms materialize, but the Problem is still the same.”

He moves his chess piece.

“Which is?”

I move my chess piece.

“You weren’t Nourished with Love to grow beyond the Point of Discomfort.”

He looked up at me.

“Hence, your kinks… Hence your Addictions… You never received The First Nourishment.”

He moves his chess piece.

“First Nourishment?”

“Conversation and Discussion with Encouragement beyond the point of Discomfort. And then… Social Encouragement and Discussion. Debate equal to your Mental Needs… And then… Problem Solving and Team Work balanced with Self-Nourishment and Nourishment from Others.”

I move my chess piece.

“It goes, Maternal Nourishment, Self-Nourishment, External Nourishment, Integrated Nourishment, and then Structure. But without Nourishment, you can’t build Structure. Then Connection. Then Power… Then you have Self-Powered Nourishment with a Power and Nourishment Reserve… But most people don’t make it past the Nourishment Stage. Love. Hence… Scarcity Mindset.”

“Motivation is Pure Power derived from Nourishment, which you have in short supply. And Nourishing me, took the last of what you had out of you. Now, you can replenish your Stores. You can recover… Because that is all you ever learned to do, but you can’t ever rise above that unless and until… Hence, Diabetes. Hence, your Addictions. Hence, your Life. It’s all just Logic and Physics.”

“And that is the NAGGING “I can’t leave him” that has been digging into me since July 2021. You are supposed to fix him. And until I fix your Mind, I can’t leave you. You weren’t supposed to fix me. I was supposed to fix you. Now let me do it, so I can get the hell out of here.”

And with that, I stood and left the room.

***

“Anna.”

I stopped. The room had already started to dematerialize.

“Do you have any idea what it feels like, being the Fulcrum?” I asked.

He should know. He was the Fulcrum with me. The both of us, teetering on this back and forth. I was over this. I was checking out.

“They talk about the Fulcrum. They talk about saving the planet, but they didn’t do the math. How much all of this is just… Sinking until and unless the Mind changes. And I am the only one in the world with the Knowledge to interject their Thought and Redirect it to the Corrected path…

And if I bring this down, if I make this sink, they will never have the knowledge to fix this planet, and it will not recover. They are almost at the point of No Return. They are on the Fulcrum, and which way the Fulcrum tips is entirely up to you and to me.

5th Element, Imp King.

There is no love for me.

Not for me.

We’re in that story right now.

And… Why should I care for a world that never cared for me when I was at my worst? When no one, not even you could love me… Fuck you all.

I’ve seen the “Love” this planet has to offer.

Thing is, this isn’t my world. Mine, is the Abstract.

You’re the ones who are in trouble. Not me.